What gets women off (part two)

vibrator-rocket

Once upon a time, in a faraway land, there was a epidemic of sexual dissatisfaction called Hysteria.  Women all over the place were getting it, the symptoms were vast and doctors were treating it by massaging the clitorises of their patients.  This method of treatment would result in what was then known as a paroxysm, or an orgasm, which would heal the multitude of ills in the hysteria potpourri.

One day, a man invented a device to ease the RSI which doctors were starting to get from all this rubbing of ladies’ private parts, and these devices, personal hand-held massagers, were sold in publications and delivered up and down the country.  This was around the 1860s, apparently, in Victorian England.  A 2011 film, Hysteria, represents the situation nicely.  Here’s the trailer:

It’s not like ladies had never masturbated before.  And of course not everyone believes masturbation is a good thing.  Some are of the opinion that it can cause all manner of unacceptable results.  I found an onion-style Christian look at women and masturbation so  graphic to the point of almost being alarmingly erotic, that it must be a piss-take.

So how do women get off?  According to the post Real Women Don’t Masturbate, where there were some sound descriptions of the act, more and more in our society are masturbating and they’re doing it with a gluttonous, hedonistic pride.  What a fabulous way to approach masturbation!

“Instead of stroking, she must invade the vaginal orifice with a foreign object. Inside the reproductive chasm, there is a special erogenous zone that must be targeted with delicate precision. Amateur female masturbation can result in dryness, chafing and even hemorrhoids and urinary tract infections. Inside the uterine pathways are many blind curves and dead ends, and the female self-gratifier needs to master this labyrinth with the agility of a rat seeking its cheese. It should be noted here that the female vagina contains several folds of skin at the aperture that are themselves highly sensitive. These are called the labia and can be massaged to the give the sensation of intercourse, but only a deep, investigative insertion will result in the explosion of histrionic emotion that the woman so desperately seeks.”

And the writer continues.

“At times, a female orgasm can be achieved during vaginal stimulation. This is done through either sexual congress or prolonged masturbation. However, the female orgasm is an entirely unpredictable incident. In such cases, a woman will moan loudly and scrape her fingernails on a nearby surface, tearing velvet pillows and plush toys to shreds. She will flop her head from side to side and reveal deep, dark secrets from her past. She may even eject a squirt of yeastial fluids that rises into the air like a decorative garden fountain. It will bubble for several seconds before subsiding.”

Mental note to self.  No masturbating near the velvet cushions.

It’s cool to masturbate.  Jane Langton did a Ted Talk on it.  We women can be more open about it if we choose.  But if not, we can just do it for all of the personal benefits on offer.

I really love Betty Dodson’s approach to teaching women how to orgasm with a vibrator – they even have videos which you can buy or pay to watch online.  Until we know how to pleasure ourselves, we can not show anyone else how to pleasure us.In a study by Dr Debra Herbenick of Indiana University and her colleagues, she found that the prevalence of women’s vibrator use was 52.5%. Vibrator users were significantly more likely to have had a gynecologic exam during the past year and to have performed genital self-examination during the previous month. Vibrator use was significantly related to several aspects of sexual function (i.e., desire, arousal, lubrication, orgasm, pain, overall function) with recent vibrator users scoring higher on most sexual function domains, indicating more positive sexual function.

The conclusion was that “Vibrator use among women is common, associated with health-promoting behaviors and positive sexual function, and rarely associated with side effects. Clinicians may find these data useful in responding to patients’ sexual issues and recommending vibrator use to improve sexual function.”

So in a nutshell, it’s good to use a vibrator* because vibrators can get women off, when women are aroused.  And getting off can cure a multitude of ills and cause one to have a very happy disposition.  Generally women masturbating with or without a vibrator and getting to know their lady parts is favourable for the lady concerned (and her partner, so that he can be informed about what feels good for her anatomy).

* There is some concern that overuse of ones vibrator can cause some problems such as dissatisfaction with their partners (because no one can compete with a piece of machinery).  As well as that, in the same way that erectile dysfunction that can be caused from excessive porn use in men, addiction to ones vibrator can create a loss of ability to get off easily without it.  The solution in both situations is to stop these activities and tools and get back to taking time self-exploring without orgasm as the goal.

One Response to What gets women off (part two)

  1. […] Part II of the series seems to fall flat with cookie cutter approaches found in many how to sex books. Perhaps O’Hara’s real answer is found when she contemplates sensual and human connection in Love within Sex Work. In this essay she speaks of her joy, of her connection to her self and to another human being.  Perhaps sex workers are more securely able to readily access their sensual selves which cut off people are less likely to do. Being able to access care giving and Attachment within the security of relationships allows sex to blossom particularly for women. Women arouse differently from men. Men have fewer safety restraints on arousal. It seem that a couple’s ability for the woman to create safety to produce a willingness to explore her own self, allows her to then experience sensuality within herself and with another person. […]

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