Tag: sex work
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Going down – is a man or a sex toy best?
The first time I saw this image on an ex-punter’s blog, I just about came on the spot. For some reason, it really does it for me. Mainly because I find oral, from this angle in particular (as opposed to from the downward approach during 69ing), the most pleasing thing ever, and if a man…
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Pleasure
Poor is the man* Whose pleasures depend On the permission of another From Justify My Love by Madonna © 2006 WMG Pleasure, according to a book I have been reading about women and aging, is something women deny themselves far more than is good for us. Apparently there is something that is released in our…
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Does the G-Spot exist?
Meg Ryan from When Harry Met Sally This is just a short post because occasionally I hear people saying the g-spot is a load of old cobblers. That may or may not be true as far as any anatomical identification goes in medical school. Rumour has it that it is the secret internal spot on the…
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Sublime Pleasure – how long is a piece of string?
Amore e Psiche by François-Édouard Picot (Painted 1817, Paris)* “How many times did you come?” is a question that many men wonder or even ask ladies after they have ascertained that their partner did actually orgasm while they had sex. However, orgasm for women is often not that cut and dried. I’ve been curious about…
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Love Within Sex Work
I found this tweet the other day and it really resonated with me. It’s because I feel exactly the same about my clients. I really love those dudes! A lot of the time I give my heart and soul to my clients, and get it back in spades. Which got me thinking. Is this professional,…
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Fake cocks in bisexual fantasies?
It’s said that we are all bisexual to a degree with some being closer to the gay end of the spectrum and others being closer to the straight end but mostly we are somewhere in between. I personally identify as bisexual but as I don’t have available a regular girl playmate who is also a…
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Talk dirty to me
You may have noticed that I offer a new service now, namely phone sex. I’ve always been the girl who loves sex and especially loves to talk about sex, I guess that’s why I have this blog: so that those who want to listen (read) can. But there is something even more wanton when you…
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Safe Sex (Play) for Clients
(life as art) This long post was originally written for a sex industry association with the brief How Not to Pick the Wrong Sex Worker and the tagline “warning signs for clients”. It has been adapted for my blog Is there a wrong type of service provider or only a wrong type of service provider…
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Safe Sex (Work) for Sex Workers
I have to say we’re pretty darned lucky in countries like New Zealand where sex work is 100% legal because it means that if anyone tries to harm us, the cops are on our side. Absolutely fabulous situation, it means exactly that because there is the threat, of the long arm of the law who…
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Is Christmas the right time to tell your family you are a sex worker?
So, you’ve been holding on to a big secret about being a sex worker on the side, you’re over it, and you suddenly feel the urge to confess all to your family, and what better time than when your entire family has come together to celebrate the birth of Christ? Like ripping off a band-aid,…
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High-class tarts versus low-down whores
Portrait of a Courtesan (c. 1520) by Palma Vecchio I always find it interesting to hear opinions on the classes of sex workers and who fits where. As I mentioned in my post about ship girls, we ship girls were considered pretty darn low-class for having sex with sailors, yet I found that the clients were…
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Let It Be Known
I really love what I do. I honestly feel that what I do helps mankind and is almost a spiritual service. I don’t mind if you laugh. I’m not saying I’m holy, or godly – I realise I’m the polar opposite of a nun. But I know that I’ve helped people through this line of…
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OUT!
The Scream by Edvard Munch One thing sex workers seem to fear most is being outed, or an aspect of their lives being outed, and interestingly it is probably the most well-used threat some sex workers make against others. However, quite often sex workers let things slip, for example by their lifestyles or in conversations…
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The virgin and the whore
I know someone who decided to save her virginity until she got married, but eventually she became a crusty old unmarried thing rattling around with that dastardly virginity which she just could not lose, as potential husbands became thin on the ground, even with the glittering reward of her virginity on offer. I, on the…
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Advice from a Client
Les Nymphes et le Satyre by William Bouguereau. 1873, Clark Art Institute, Williamstown, Massachusetts. I welcome contributions from readers and clients, and while the contributor below has never been to see me, I gather he has chalked up quite a bit of experience seeing working ladies in his time. Over to him: I have been…
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Politics and Working Girls
A working girl (in the other sense of the word or apparently the equal of*) Like all tales of politics, this could get long and boring. Personally, I have spent my life being a tiny dot amongst big groups of people starting with my huge immediate and wider family and large church communities, various groups…
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Why would you want to be a sex worker?
Veronica Veronese* by Dante Gabriel Rossetti painted in 1872 with Alexa Wilding as the model. It is believed to represent “the artistic soul in the act of creation”. I’ve always liked new beginnings although of course generally they are nothing more than a mental reset. So the start of a new year is as good a…
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Men who love breasts
The bosom of Amber O’Hara I have my share of “breast men” who call on me, (which is lucky because I’ve always thought my derriere is not really anything to write home about). For these men who fantasize about the wonders of a luscious bosom, I flaunt my body, usually dressing in low-cut blouses, which…
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Celebrating erotic red hair
As I have mentioned in previous blog posts, even though in society there are often disparaging remarks made about natural redheads, there are certain men who have a preference for redheads and find us extremely sexy. As I am one of the few naturally red-haired escorts in my city, I am lucky enough to be…
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Loving relationships: can a sex worker have it all?
“I loved you since I knew ya, I wouldn’t talk down to ya”…* I’ve known sex workers since I began working as a teenager who have been in long term relationships with people since before they were sex workers, as well as relationships which started while they were sex workers with their clients and with…
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Dear Baby Hooker…
Congratulations! You’ve recognised that you can put a value on something that there is a bit of a demand for and decided to become a sex worker. Here are some things that I’ve gleaned over the years, or that I wish I’d known way back when. Once you’ve been a sex worker, you will always…
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Are you old enough?
Still from the music video of Dragon’s Are You Old Enough? The legal age to be a sex worker in New Zealand is 18 and most sex workers will not accept clients under 18. According to my (light) investigations, there is actually no age restriction for sex workers’ clients other than the age restriction…
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Fear of Fifty
Flidais, my favourite Celtic Goddess, of a voracious sexual appetite Part of us wants to love like the goddesses — coldly and capriciously. Part of us owes allegiance to Kali, eating her lover and attaching his skull to her waist. Part of us wants to love like Juno, scooping up mortal men, toying with them, then…
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Where to from here?
Amber O’Hara not ready to turn her back on sex work … yetIt’s hard to believe that it’s almost a year since I embarked again on the sex work journey with certain financial goals in mind. My very first blog post, my personal yet public record of the events related to becoming a sex worker,…
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Slightly kink – English
English is not a term that is commonly used to describe caning and other parallel activities, but apparently it used to be and I feel it is quite obvious where that term came from, for anyone who prior to 1980 had any experience of English-style boarding schools, boys’ boarding schools that is. I went to…
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Slightly kink – Greek
The tiniest bit of what I do is slightly kink, so if you get slightly squeamish about anything that is not totally straight you may want to skip this post. Because it’s about anal. I first heard about anal sex as an enjoyable concept when I was a young woman. A friend of mine…
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Slightly kink – Japanese
I don’t know if it is a thing that japanese people* do – but we jokingly call sex while menstruating “Japanese”, referring to the fact that a large red puddle of blood on a white sheet resembles the japanese flag. Yes, more squemishness may be in store for you and you may even doubt this but…
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Who’s that talking about you?
Sharon O’Neill (right) who wrote the song Maxine with the actress who played her in the Australian version of the music video (which this image is taken from.) A few days after my Christmas day blog post about whether or not a sex worker should tell her family she is a sex worker, I had a long…
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All hookers are crazy
Like many sex workers, Brigid was a goddess of contradiction. I do believe that, to a degree, due to the nature of the job, all hookers are slightly crazy. That’s because, among the many other crazy-making issues, the one that is the most anxiety-inducing of all is that no matter how open about what we…
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Who are my clients?
Édouard Manet painting possibly representing clients and sex workers Some people are curious and I have been asked who my clients are. I suspect to make themselves feel better about their negative attitudes towards sex work and to feel removed from it as much as possible, some like to think of sex workers’ clients as…