1978 movie Pretty Baby publicity still* As Christmas is for family get-togethers, I occasionally ponder at this time of year, the place of sex workers within, or their relationships with, their families. Lately I have been talking with a few sex workers who have other family members also in the industry. Even though there are…
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What gets women off (part one)
It’s been widely concluded that it’s harder for women to get aroused than men, and that it takes longer. That some women lose interest in sex. That some women have a lower libido overall than most men. The thing is with (straight) men, a glimpse of bosom or derrière seems to be able to do…
Exit: Stage Left
There comes a time in a sex worker’s life when, despite the lovely harem of men who are her willing clients, she sometimes thinks that she has had enough of fucking for money. It may not be a feeling that comes on suddenly, like an epiphany, instead it may be a slowly evolving feeling of…
Fifty Shades of Fucked Up*
NOT a scene from the film but these are the male and female leads. *”Fifty Shades of Fucked Up” is how the character Christian Grey describes himself. I did not leave the cinema totally disappointed, I have sat through worse films than Fifty Shades of Grey. This is a nice little film. It is ok. …
Loving relationships: can a sex worker have it all?
“I loved you since I knew ya, I wouldn’t talk down to ya”…* I’ve known sex workers since I began working as a teenager who have been in long term relationships with people since before they were sex workers, as well as relationships which started while they were sex workers with their clients and with…
Ways to do sex work – part one (cam work)
My new occasional series about selling sex happily coincides with the impending release of a film about cam models (ladies who interact with paying and non-paying internet customers via web cams). It is kind of like live porn, being largely user-directed and featuring a solitary actor (it is quite complicated to do it with more…
Sex work, mental health and sex addiction
From the show The Daring Young Man on the Flying Trapeze by Max Gimblett I found it interesting when a sex worker I am acquainted with wrote that her father, on finding out she was a sex worker, enquired as to how she was going to safe guard her soul. He could just as easily have…
Men love to look
How to hold the attention of men* There comes an interesting time in the lives of young women when we realise the effect that our body has on men. It could be when out of the corner of our eye, we see that male head is turned as we totter across the road in our…
Is your New Year’s resolution to have more sex?
Nicole Kidman and Tom Cruise in Eyes Wide Shut In 1999, Stanley Kubrick released his last film, Eyes Wide Shut, which starred Kidman and Cruise, ‘a Hollywood couple whose marriage was in trouble, about a New York couple whose marriage was in trouble.’ It was famous for an orgy scene, but in the subtext of the film,…
Sex and Skin Hunger
J W Waterhouse The Awakening of Adonis (detail) Here is a guest post by a client talking about how sex workers have helped the issue of ‘skin hunger’ for him personally, following a discussion we had during our booking, which he has mentioned below. I invited him to contribute to my blog after this discussion as…
So, you are the black sheep of the family…
Christmas is the time of year when we are confronted by where we came from – most of us, while not necessarily being physically present with our family members, at least make contact with them – and the realities of who they are (and maybe what they have always been like) becomes glaringly apparent. Families…
Safe Sex (Play) for Clients
(life as art) This long post was originally written for a sex industry association with the brief How Not to Pick the Wrong Sex Worker and the tagline “warning signs for clients”. It has been adapted for my blog Is there a wrong type of service provider or only a wrong type of service provider…
Orgasms – the great anti-aging secret?
Jane Fonda – still hot in her advancing years – although she admits she has had plastic surgery, she is open about a happy sex life and her appreciation of porn. Could this be the real reason she still has a rather sexy twinkle in her eye? I’ve lost count of the number of…
Dear Baby Hooker…
Congratulations! You’ve recognised that you can put a value on something that there is a bit of a demand for and decided to become a sex worker. Here are some things that I’ve gleaned over the years, or that I wish I’d known way back when. Once you’ve been a sex worker, you will always…
Cleanliness and godliness
The other day I was in a cafe and there was a young mother at the next table. She screwed up her nose a bit and said to her son, about 11 years old, “have you had a shower today?” He was quick to say yes, but I quickly glanced at his mother and she…
The Joy of (Phone) Sex
Among the men I am fortunate to sexually liaise with are interesting, intelligent, creative types. One of my clients who I regularly enjoy phone sex with is in this category and he thanked me by sending me his account of a recent session. I find it very erotic. He has given me permission to share it. …